Golf balls, boats and charity – and I need your help

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose

Thus says Winston Churchill — and, boy, was he ever right. Trying to hit a golf ball with a golf club is on the same difficulty level as trying to hunt a kudu with a shoelace. Does that simile even make sense? No. But neither does golf.

And as if golf wasn’t difficult enough, the lovely people at Nedbank have decided to make it even harder.

On Wednesday morning I’ll be taking part in the Durban Longshots Challenge along with some really famous celeb people, including former Bafana captain Neil Tovey, Sharks legends Stefan Terblanche, AJ Venter and Andre Joubert, and Ard Matthews. Longshots is basically a variant of extreme golf — what this means is that you make it so difficult that it’s bound to make me embarrass myself (thanks, guys). What we’ll be doing is hitting golf balls at a target on a beach. When I first heard that, I was rather excited. It didn’t sounds that tough. Then I was told that I would be teeing off from a boat! That’s right, and actual boat. And this actual boat will actually be bobbing around in the actual Indian Ocean.

Vote for me by going to
Vote for me by going to

Mike from Cerebra got in touch a few days ago and asked if I was keen. I said I was. Then we spoke about my golfing skills. This was how the conversation went:

Me: I do occasionally hack on the golf course, but I know I won’t get anywhere near the target!

Mike: Don’t worry about hitting the target, just worry about hitting the ball! I’m pretty sure that hitting golf balls off a rocking yacht is going to play havoc with all the guys, regardless of golfing prowess.

Basically, Mike told me I’m stuffed and will be making a fool of myself. Nice.

However — and here’s the cool part — my tomfoolery is not without benefit. I’ll be raising funds for The Sports Trust, a really worthy project. Here’s where you come in: I need your votes!

My name's Matthew. And I need YOU to vote for me.
My name’s Matthew. And I need YOU to vote for me.

The more votes I get through the Longshots app, the more golf balls I get to hit. The more balls I get to hit, the greater the chance of me securing the donation to The Sports Trust. All you have to do is vote for me and give me balls. That’s right, one click gives me balls.

So, how about it? Will you help me out? It’s for a good cause, you know… You can track my progress by following me on Twitter or on Facebook.

I kind of hope the target is a little like this one...
I kind of hope the target is a little like this one…

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